Trick or treat! On this Halloween night, we have a ghoulishly spectacular surprise episode for you. Are you dreaming? Can you be sure? Did that ominously tall and imposing figure really summon Jawa raiders from the depths of hell to…I guess, you know…steal bodies and…shrink them down…and put them to work in some alternate world with a lot of gravity.

BOOOOOY, stop asking questions and beware the Tall Man’s buzzing balls of DEATH in…Phantasm!

This week we follow the story of a man. A man who broke with the conventions of society. A man who wanted to escape the perils of reality. A man with a dream, a cave, and a psychotic laugh. Unfortunately for this man, he just happened to stumble into the cave of the Necronomicon and his hopes and dreams (much like his body) will be dashed into oblivion all for the sake of returning a book to Satan. Strap on your wings but beware stone crosses—they may be closer than they appear, and join us for our discussion of Equinox.

Did you ever wish that you had a twin, so you could take turns slogging through the mundane elements of life? What if you had seven twins? And what if your Dad, in hiding you from the dystopic anti-children government decided to name each of you after one day of the week? Well come on down for some wacky hijinks…. *sigh* No, don’t tell me, this is going to go dark and grim really fast, isn’t it? What Happened to Monday? Plot contrivances, that’s what!

Under the sea. Yes, under the sea. Life is certainly better, down where it’s wetter, under the—holy crap did that mermaid just sprout fangs and tear out that guy’s still-beating heart?! Oh, no, wait, okay, that was a fever dream right, and of course under the sea is just the place to—oh nevermind. There she goes, heart in fangs, back to the water. But, next up, a catchy music number. Yes, we’re watching the Polish horror musical, The Lure.

Tonight on Biography…we take a look into the sordid life of one Reverend Harry Powell. Yes, it’s a tragic tale, filled with love, lust, murder, and fittingly on-the-nose knuckle tattoos, but there’s a deeper story to be told. The story…of a poor man named Peter Graves. And this is Biography, on A&E.

Beware black cats. And strange people in the night. And…well, a lot of things. But for Samurai, you might not want to escort that woman back home through the bamboo grove. Join us this week for our discussion of Kuroneko.